Sure…I’ve herd of an embargo

sheeple

Sheeple.  Americans are the biggest damn sheep. Disaster-diddling, misery motivated, herd horders of all time. No wonder religion finds it’s home on our shores so readily. Now we’re frightened of a food shortage.

I read on the interswebsnet that Sam Club and WalMart are limiting the amount of rice that a customer can buy. I thought to myself that this surely won’t affect how people shop here in lovely, bitter-assed-cold Star Valley. Lo and behold the rice in our store started flying off the shelves. Mind you these sheeple don’t know the first thing about eating rice, since it’s been collecting dust for months now save for a few of us who have a rice cooker. Even the slightest whisper of food being rationed makes the Borg collective move like white on …well… rice.

Oh the world is going to hell in a hand basket and fuel is creeping over $4’s a gallon yet all is well with a 20 pound bag of rice nestled next to my Hostess twinkies and my 40 sodium rich-nutrition free $1 sale frozen pizzas. Bitch!!! when was the last time you ate fucking rice? Risotto even? Yeah well kiss my Democratic ass you bloody bush supporters, eat your fattened pets or better yet your mindless-Britney Spears wanabe kids.

The rest of us are starving and you’re just about ready for the sausage factory.

Explore posts in the same categories: Blog Posts

12 Comments on “Sure…I’ve herd of an embargo”

  1. Jess Says:

    Now, that’s funny (and sad). They cleared out the rice supply in the local store? Are these people crazy?

    I heard about this, but it didn’t prompt me to run out and buy rice. What’s wrong with people? Maybe it’s like the oil Bush’s cronies have bid up so high. They’re not interested in eating the rice; they’re investing in it! That was a commodity purchase you witnessed!

  2. Snooze Says:

    Very well said! and let’s face it, it’s not like many north americans couldn’t do anyhow with cutting back a little on the amount of food they consume.

  3. Doug Says:

    I wonder if restaurants will start charging more for red beans & rice.

    “I’d like the red beans, please.”
    “Would you like rice with that?”
    “No, thanks. I’m on a budget.”

  4. koreanish Says:

    Now more than ever, it’s time to give up carbs.

    I love your new photo.

  5. Lewis Says:

    What do you suppose all of the Asian restaurants are going to start serving with their food? Mashed Potatos? Doesn’t sound pretty, does it? Can you imagine Kung Pao Chicken with mashed potatos?

  6. the cajun Says:

    OK, so what I have been asking since this “story” broke is how many fucking families buy 20 pound bags of rice? The sheeple really don’t think anymore. And it isn’t a problem here.

    The stoopid, it burns.

    Thanks for the rant.

  7. Brenthoven Says:

    Hi Cajun, at last I find you! Sensationalism laced with fear really sells press! “Rice is nice!”
    (This is going to sound like a really bad poem or words to a very bad song… ;) The Price of Rice is ONLY a big
    cover up for raising the price of corn, wheat, any dairy products.)
    Every year in my restaurant there is a NEW ACT OF GOD DISASTER THAT CAUSES THE PRICE OF BEEF, CHICKEN or PORK to
    leap into the unknown! Most of my fresh fruit comes from Mexico and Thailand! My beef comes out of Oregon and all of my Lamb comes out of New Zealand along with my Orange Roughy! Rice is nice and I must have my Risotto! I remember years ago when the price of hamburger flew sky high. People stopped buying it… within 24 hours the price dropped below what it had been selling for! Rice Queens Rule Baby! See You in about 5 days.

  8. tornwordo Says:

    The same thing is happening up here. I don’t get it. But then I don’t get buying Evian water either, where you’re paying over 20 bucks a gallon for it. For water. Such retardation.

  9. peppercorn Says:

    so what you’re saying is…

  10. Brian Finch Says:

    We could, as Madonna puts it “Save the World in 4 Minutes” by taking our entitled gluttonous North American culture and simply eat half the amount of calories a day, and thought about something else other than it is a right to drive a car and consume as much gas as we need.

    Thank god I got HIV and the meds are forcing off of major carbs to keep the lipo stomach from happening. The lord works in mysterious ways, it’s my contribution to saving the world.

  11. christopher Says:

    I am often amazed by the mob mentality people have too. I’m not certain why folks that have never eaten rice in years thought they needed a sack of rice now either. mom did the same thing, and while she does use rice, I’ve never known her to cook real rice. Always the “minute rice” cooker she was, She was amazed at rossotto when I fixed it a few weeks ago…the comment made was I ain’t never seen rice like that before.

    LOL; rice is the first floatation of a rumor of rationing; bet other foods that aren’t moving too fast get scarce” over the next few months too!

    -C

  12. Flour Says:

    In NY recently I saw a sign in the bagel shop that due to flour shortage the prices were going up–flour too?

Comment: